Even when you can’t accept, your healing continues.
For those walking the long, disorienting road of withdrawal, there is sometimes a deep sense of frustration and despair when symptoms persist despite doing all the right things. You meditate. You try to accept. You practise good sleep hygiene. You avoid triggers. You do everything you’ve been taught about mindfulness, neuroplasticity, and allowing. Yet, still, the fear, the pain, the insomnia, the disconnection won’t lift. And when this happens, it can feel like you are doing something wrong.
But you are not.
One of the most important things to understand, and to keep coming back to, is that withdrawal symptoms are not a reflection of your mindset, your willpower, or your emotional strength. They arise from complex neurochemical changes, from a nervous system that is trying to recalibrate itself after being disrupted. In other words: it is chemical, not personal.
This distinction matters because when we forget the chemical nature of withdrawal, we start blaming ourselves. We think we are not accepting enough, not rewiring properly, not being mindful enough, not eating properly, being too active, not being active enough… you name it. That belief can quietly erode hope and send us into a spiral of guilt, shame, and self-doubt, all of which can add an extra layer of suffering to what is already a very painful process. So, yes, it is importnt to be accepting, to be mindful, to eat healthily, to be proactive while remaining aware of your activity threshold and not overstimulate your nervous system, but your symptoms will be present because your body is learning to function again without the drug and while your receptors are being upregulated, withdrawal symptoms can emerge.
True acceptance, in this context, includes accepting that symptoms may not shift even when we are doing everything ‘right’. It means letting go of the idea that if we just find the right formula, we will feel better instantly. That is not how this healing process works. This is a non-linear, often baffling journey. Sometimes, the very best you can do is keep steady within the storm, not trying to stop it, but letting it pass through you as the body does its work in the background.
And what about when you can’t accept? What about when you are exhausted, frightened, and the symptoms feel unbearable? Then the practice becomes even more subtle: you accept the not-accepting. Letting that resistance be there too. Meeting your limits with kindness. That is still part of the path.
There is nothing broken in you. Nothing that needs fixing. Only a body that is doing its best to restore balance, and a spirit that keeps showing up despite how heavy this all feels.
If you are in a place where nothing seems to change, or things feel worse, please do not assume it means you’re failing. It may just mean your healing is happening quietly, in a way you can’t yet feel. The sun is shining behind the clouds. Things are not falling apart. They are falling into place. You are healing and in time you will have evidence of this. In the meantime, keep being gentle and kind to yourself. That is your work to do, while the body heals.
With much compassion,
Baylissa