Toxic positivity refers to the phenomenon where individuals or groups enforce an expectation of constant happiness, optimism, and positivity, regardless of the circumstances. While positivity in itself is not inherently harmful, toxic positivity becomes problematic when it suppresses or invalidates genuine emotions and experiences, especially negative ones like sadness, anger, or frustration.
One of the key aspects of toxic positivity is its dismissal or avoidance of anything perceived as negative. People might respond to someone expressing their struggles or hardships with clichéd phrases like “Just think positive,” “Everything happens for a reason,” or “Don’t worry, be happy.” While these statements may come from a well-intentioned place, they often undermine the complexity of human emotions and experiences.
During this and other healing processes, it is normal to feel overwhelmed, invalidated, distressed, angry at times, and to have other emotions that would be regarded as bad or dark if being considered from a toxic positivity stance. The pressure to maintain a facade of constant happiness can be damaging in these situations. It creates an unrealistic standard where people feel compelled to hide their true feelings, fearing judgment or rejection if they express anything other than positivity. This suppression of emotions can lead to feelings of isolation, inadequacy, and even exacerbate certain signs of healing such as anxiety and depression.
Furthermore, toxic positivity can be particularly harmful in situations of trauma or grief. When someone is going through a difficult time, being told to “look on the bright side” or “stay positive” can feel dismissive of their pain and invalidate their need for support and understanding.
It is essential to recognise that experiencing a range of emotions, both positive and negative, is a natural part of being human. Embracing emotional authenticity allows individuals to process their feelings healthily, validate their perception of their experences, and build genuine connections with the self and others.
Instead of promoting toxic positivity, it’s important to foster environments where people feel safe to express their true emotions without fear of judgment or rejection. Encouraging empathy, active listening, and validation can go a long way in supporting emotional well-being and fostering genuine positivity. To explore this topic further, please see our Toxic Positivity webinar.
With much compassion,
